How can we tell mature love from immature ones? Are they clear cut? Yes, indeed they are. When you love from a mature self, you have no problem expressing your needs and expecting them to be fulfilled. When you operate from immature love, you expect your partner to be a mind reader, expecting them to know your needs and meet them without you expressing them.

Growing up in a dysfunctional home meant your parents were emotionally immature and therefore only expressed immature love to each other and to you. This behavior is modeled and passed down. Good thing you are improving yourself and therefore becoming a cycle breaker!

What does immature love look like? Well, if you grew up in a dysfunctional home, you probably experienced eye rolls, passive-aggressive comments, dismissal, avoidance at all cost, etc. We all are familiar with the lack of authentic communication.

Mature love feels safe to express your needs and your wants, you are heard, you are seen and therefore you feel safe and loved. There is no punishment for making a request out of your needs. Below are some examples of what mature love looks like:

• My love language is words of affirmation. I would like for you to tell me you care for me often.

• If we are going to work together on the garden this weekend, I need you to help me out by doing x. Are you on the same page?

• Financial security is very important to me. I would like for us to come up with a financial plan together.

• I feel ignored lately and that makes me feel lonely. Could we have a conversation about what is going on? How can I support you?

I have created a unique 12-step program that helps individuals transform from the inside out to give you that solid foundation you deserve. If you are interested in learning more, click here for more information.

I will leave you with this question to ponder. How does it feel to be loved by mature, loving people?

Sincerely, Vania

Photo by Jonathan Borba on Unsplash